April 12, 2011

ET, phone someone else's home.

I have a new rule.  Listen up.

If you are a telemarketer calling my home phone number, you must know that when I immediately hang the phone up without saying a word, I am kindly telling you to please put me on your do not call list.  Please.

There is nothing worse than the shrill sound of a sales pitch to shatter the lucid environment I have created to let my baby sleep.  You're pretty much lucky I can't reach through the phone and you are in far better shape with me just hanging up.

It is important for all to know that I, myself, have been in "sales."  By sales, I mean glorified telemarketing. This is a relentlessly dull, pride-sucking position that desperately jeopardizes ones toleration for fellow man, and I mean no disrespect.  Kudos for your dedication.  

I know how badly you want to destroy your headset Office Space style each time you have to cold call a bitter, in a rush, unfriendly potential customer and I'm only trying to save you from the unpleasantry.  Me?  I'm not bitter [that much], but I am in a rush, and if you wake my child I'm going to be a bit unfriendly and I apologize for it.  This is my way of avoiding this uncomfortable interchange.

So, like I said, no thanks, and thanks.

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